More about Faith, Less about Trust.

Faith is spiritual, trust is not.

I was very young when I first found a 12 step recovery, and I didn’t drive for a long time. I relied on members to get me to and from meetings. And many a time I’d be sitting outside of the apartment complex waiting on someone to pick me up and they’d be running 30, 40 min, or even an hour late. I used to get so pissed off, and after a while, I started realizing that there are times when shit happens, and there’s nothing we can do about it.

I learn to have faith in one’s ability.

I learned to have faith in someone’s ability to pick me up when they say they’re going to pick me up. That has nothing to do with trust. That’s why I do not see trust as a spiritual principle. Faith is. Suppose I put trust in you being where you say you’ll be, and then you don’t show up, guess what? You’ve broken my “trust.” It’s fallible. But if I have faith that you had every intention and had every ability to show up when you say you’re going to show up, but then something happens. For whatever reason, you don’t show up on time. Maybe you get sick, have an accident, have a flat tire, or your car breaks down. I still have absolute faith that you were capable of.

My faith remains intact.

I still have complete faith that you capable of doing what you said. Even if you simply overslept, you still had the ability. I can put my faith in you, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do to break that faith. When I put that spiritual principle unconditionally in you, that has to do with seeing your capacity, what you’re capable of, and it has no bearing on what you do.

Every morning I meditate, every evening I inventory.

These principles and each one of these steps is meant to be worked and applied daily. My foundation today is the 12 Essential Spiritual Principles, I’ve learned to regularly turn to, to the best of my ability. I am not perfect by any means. You want to see me lose principles and lose my serenity, ride with me in a cage (bikers term for a car), Especially during rush hour traffic in Dallas. For that reason, I put the little JnP logo on the back of my car. So when I see it through my rearview mirror, it reminds me to stay on the journey in principle. It helps me be a calmer driver. At least in theory.

That’s the real foundation of my faith today. 

It is remembering to continuously show up at least enough to continue giving what I got. Otherwise, I’ll lose it. I’ve lost everything once before. I don’t want to fall short again. I’m not saying you should give so much that you end up enabling those who do nothing. I believe in equal responsibility in being self-supporting. Even when I can’t give in one way, there is always a way to “do my part.” I just have to maintain my faith in my own capabilities as well as yours.

I find your personal Values to be of little importance.

Black background in support of BLM.
Stating that self worth comes from how we treat the world.

Whenever we get to talking about values, I have a little different perception. I don’t put a lot of weight into ‘values’ these days.
I’ve quit worrying about morals, stopped worrying about ethics, quit worrying about values. Those are subjective. Those are dependent on what we’re taught at any given time from the culture that we grew up in.

If you look up the definition of values, you won’t see ‘values’ itself. It is ‘value.’ A singular noun. Almost every definition has to do with ‘worth.’ Somewhere down in there, around the tenth definition, there will be one that says ‘values’ plural. And it’s still about worth and it, but it talks about the societal worth given by common ideas within a community.

“We become able to make wise and loving decisions based on principles and ideas that have real value in our lives.”

Just for Today
Continue reading “I find your personal Values to be of little importance.”

How I found purpose through Regret – part 3

Having recognized both our shared dream as well as our shared skepticism, we have to have a plan in place—a plan to feed our goals, not our doubts.

Here are 12 Steps we are using to ignite the Principles to define the Journey in this shared area of our lives.

Cliche image but is my wife's and my hands together creating a heart with the sun-shining through.
  • 1) We find Hope in our common goal. When we admit that we are powerless over our past, we nurture our shared Hope by recognizing that our future together depends on our Unity together.
  • 2) We learn to Surrender our individual, “in the moment,” thoughts of insanity. We acknowledge that our shared expressions – combined conscientiousness – is greater than our individual thoughts. As a couple, we are restored to Sanity as we make better decisions together.
Continue reading “How I found purpose through Regret – part 3”